You could say I'm a bit bipolar when it comes to the holidays.
On one hand:
I love the holidays. Everything so happy and festive, and I just love it. The decorating, the togetherness, the warmth; all of it. The laughter. Freezing your ass off in the snow, then the warms of cuddling up on the couch with a cup of hot chocolate while your body slowly warms back up.
One the other hand:
I see all of these amazingly touching moments between family members, and I don't know what I'd call it; jealousy? I never had any of that, at all. Not with my own family anyway. Don't get me wrong I had people in my life who were closer to me than blood; and welcomed me into their families; and they will never know how much that meant to me; but I guess in the back of my mind I sill wanted my family to be one of those.
I have no idea how to describe the depression that comes with being with a happy family and them having invited you in to be happy, and then out of nowhere a thought of your own family will run across your mind and it just brings you down.
It's like your mind can't even allow you to e happy even when you're given the chance to be.
*sigh*
Sorry for my random cry baby post.











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Good girls are made of suger and spice... I on the other hand are made from vodka and ice
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"Look down at me and you see a fool; look up at me and you see a god; look straight at me and you see yourself."
- Charles Manson
warning: by watching this deviant you risk exposure to high levels of sarcasm; it is in no way intended to be offensive.
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~MoofViking is my wonderful boyfriend, go and say hi!
Morellan of the Tuatha De Danaan;
Glera, human by birth only (deceased)
Ylva, elfen child of the Fey.
YOU HAVE ACCOMPLISHED SHIT. STFU.
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"Look down at me and you see a fool; look up at me and you see a god; look straight at me and you see yourself."
- Charles Manson
--
~I want 2 B a shinigami
I want to have a demon butler
I want to learn alchemy
I want 2 B in the S.O.S brigade
I want 2 B in the host club
~ye harm none do as ye will